I find it hard to keep my composure when everything seems to be going aerie. I am having a hard time dealing with the cards I have been dealt with lately, and I can't help but lose my strength when I pass by my neighbors' houses' and see them and their friends/families laughing and having a good time, drinking, playing cards... things I could be doing if I were at home. But instead, I spend my nights off watching TV, doing laundry, and calling everyone in my phone book when I used to HATE talking on the phone. I am obsessed now. You would think I am back in high school. I am completely lonely. Me and Vic are on complete opposite schedules and some days we only see each other for a half hour... if we are lucky. By the time he gets off work, I am usually in bed or ready to go to bed. It's terrible. Living here has it's many perks, but right now... this is becoming somewhat miserable. I hate to be complaining about it, because I know I am not the only one in the world that is going through this, I am just not used to it and I took for granted all the times I had off with Vic... and life was just so much easier when we lived back home. But I guess we weren't looking for the easy life when we moved here. It is supposed to be harder, it is supposed to be like this. I can already feel my skin getting thicker and I know that I will come out a much stronger person and that some day things will get easier and better.
We had friends come and visit us last week and it was so nice. I have missed my best friend so much. We took them out to the beaches, went to Griffith Park, on a night time TV show and even spotted A.C. Slater at the Grove doing the Extra show.. pretty cool! And even though this contradicts what I was talking about in the previous paragraph, I still can't believe how lucky I am to live here. It makes the hard days a little easier when I know that I have made it here, and that I proved everyone wrong by making it in LA and staying in one piece (most of the time anyway)...
I start my classes tomorrow. I am not fully registered, but my goal is to go to every single class that I need to take from 8 am to 6 pm and try to get enrolled by the instructor. Ahhhh I have tried to register from day one but classes filled up so fast so this is the only option I have. Sucks. It was sooo much easier at JCC. Buuutttt, this campus is soo nice and I can tell I am going to love it here. I am looking forward to keeping my GPA up and focusing on school so that work won't seem like the only thing I have going on in my life. I am really excited, even with all of the stress. It will be totally worth it.
