For what it's worth

I have been sitting here in my living room for the past couple hours (mainly making myself scarce from the demon cat that we are watching currently) with back to back episodes of The Wonder Years. The Wonder Years is a light, meaningful tv show set back in the late 60's/early 70's about a boy going through his adolescence and dealing with all the pressures and joys of being a teenager. I have to say, watching it really makes me want to go back in some weird way. I hated my teenage years, but there were definitely some perks that I miss and think back on often. 

As much as I'm used to the idea and frankly, understanding of my parents' divorce, I still miss them being together. I miss doing things together as a family. I miss my dad staying up with me teaching me about Elton John and Eric Clapton while he would light stick after stick of incense. I would miss going in the basement watching them practice with their band. I sometimes hated it when they would have band practice on Friday nights cause TGIF seemed way cooler than their music, when in all reality they were actually quite good. My mom was the lead singer, and my dad was the drummer. I got kind of lucky living in the house I grew up in, and I never fully appreciated that until now.

Even though high school was hell on earth for me, there were definitely some perks. Like, my friends for example... and Kyle. Having him around made everything seem easier, and more exciting. He would come over and we would sit around watching movies, listening to music and talking about everything we loved about Pink Floyd, and Pearl Jam. I had never met anyone like him, and still haven't to this day. He brought out something inside me that I don't remember having before I met him. I can't put my finger on what that something is, but I know I have never let it go. I miss him, I miss being able to talk to him when I want to and keeping up with each others lives. Losing him 5 years ago still doesn't seem real, and I don't think it ever will. I just keep in mind that I am the fortunate one to have known him, I just wish a lot more people could have met him... he would have grabbed life by the balls. He was great.